...I meet with my professor to discuss the fact that I do not think I should be working in her lab anymore, even though she expects me to complete two more semesters with her while I begin (and complete) my Honors thesis.
This is really going against my nature... it's much easier for me to just stick it out in a situation, even though I may not enjoy it, in order to keep people happy. But I really feel like this is something I need to do. It's my last year at school (sort-of) and my time is very precious. I want to spend it in ways that are useful, and not on completing a thesis that is altogether irrelevant with the rest of my life.
I feel like my new plan for my thesis (which I'll explain here soon) offers an opportunity for me to make a tangible difference in the lives of others, and to pursue a dream that has been brewing in me since Mexico. I have dreamed of making a difference in the inequalities of our school systems, and of giving kids from families with less money an equal chance to be successful. My thesis is a perfect avenue for this, and at this point I feel that pursuing anything else would be going against the plan for my life.
So, I need to quit on my professor who has been very helpful to me, who has sacrificed her own time in training me, and who expects me to be working on projects for her for the next two semesters. Oh, and I'm enrolled in her class this semester. That makes it even worse... because I am GUARANTEED to still see her after this is all said and done.
And it all happens tomorrow. I am excited, because I know I am doing the right thing for my life and my dreams, but I am SO scared of quitting. Please pray for me. I hate disappointing people, but it is what needs to be done. Pray that I have the strength to be honest with her, and pray that she will have grace and understanding for my situation. Please. I am so terrified and I cannot emphasize enough how much I need the strength of God behind me right now.
Thanks. Love ya.
2 comments:
Wow, it sounds like you've really thought this thing through and are making a wise, as well as difficult, decision.
I wish more of us felt the freedom to follow our passions.
I know it will be difficult and awkward at first, but I actually think it is a good thing for you to be in her class. The easy route after making a tough decision is to run from it. You won't have that luxury. It will be difficult at first, but eventually I think it will be rewarding. If nothing else, it will stretch you as a person.
You've taught me something this morning, thanks.
Thanks a lot JJ, seriously. I really appreciate you responding. I don't really have time to update now, but things went very well!!
Post a Comment